I hope everyone had a good weekend. Congrats to the World Champion New York Giants, and a big LOL to Tom Brady for coming up short again. Now the talk shifts from Brady being one of the greatest QB’s of all time, and in the same breath as Montana and Bradshaw to the fact that since the Patriots got caught cheating, he’s 0-2 in the big game.
Turns out his wife is a bitch too, which helps those who envy the fact that Tom seems to have the world by the short hairs sleep a bit easier. It just makes you think that no matter how amazing, or beautiful a woman might appear: Somewhere, there is a guy who is tired of fucking her, and listening to her bitch and moan.
I wanted to write about something that seems to be lost in today’s conversation: Compromise.
Somehow we’ve turned into this black and white, cut and dry, my-way-or-the-highway society and it’s ruining EVERYTHING. In the political scene it has caused complete gridlock among our elected officials. In 2010, we elected a batch of new Tea-Party Republicans who came in with an agenda that was unyielding and extreme, and kowtowing to their platform has caused the GOP to essentially vote against their own beliefs. There is no better example of this than the recent vote to cut the payroll tax. Republicans LOVE cutting taxes and in fact, this proposal was Republican in origin. The needle moved so far to the right that Republicans needed to come out AGAINST tax cuts because to support an idea put forth by the Democratic President would mean that they agreed – they would be willing to compromise.
… And we can’t have that.
In business it is the people who know how to work together who generally get ahead. I’m constantly greeted by people who are looking not to work as a unit towards the the greater good, but instead want to undermine the efforts of others. I never understood that – If I do well, I’m going to take some people along for the ride. I’ve always had that attitude, and it’s always helped me to be successful in my business dealings. It’s always refreshing when a bar owner expresses that they enjoy working with me. The stories I hear about other relationships serves to strengthen my resolve, and keep growing my business. Three years ago I was begging to play in smoky dive bars in the middle of nowhere. Now, I’m about to head down to Maryland for several shows at some of the best venues in the country. Instead of 30 or 40 friends coming out to see us play a thrown together show, we will play for thousands of people. I’m humble, and happy that I’m successful. It’s not luck, it’s knowing how to conduct business, and how to work with venues and compromise in an effort to grow.
There are people who launch personal attacks as a reaction. There are people who would rather say, “Fuck him – he’s not that good, we are way better, he just got lucky.” instead of asking, “What is he doing that works? What can I learn from his success? How can I work WITH him to help MY business, too?”
In relationships, it goes without saying that there needs to be some form of compromise. Figuring out schedules, seeing each other, interest, effort, etc. – it needs to be a two way street. I love the word “reciprocity” because it’s basically just a fancy word that people don’t understand means “compromise. It helps to weed out people who don’t know big words. There has to be a give-and-take for things to go well. My schedule sucks for the next two weeks, and I’d really like to see you. No problem! Let ME work around YOUR schedule this time because while it’s not ideal, I’d like to see you, too. You want to go drinking with your buddies instead of hanging with me? No problem – just make sure you come to my mom’s birthday party. It’s not rocket science, but there are people who won’t lift a finger to leave their comfort zone, and then wonder why people won’t put up with them for long.
You know the one place that has NO compromise that really needs some? Religion. If there is a better example how a failure to compromise is destructive, I’d love for someone to explain it to me. It’s not even so much compromise as it is a complete refusal to acknowledge or respect differing viewpoints. It’s a bunch of people fighting over shit that was written thousands of years ago by men. It’s people KILLING other people for not sharing the same view. It’s wars and genocide in the name of refusing to compromise. Maybe that’s why I don’t really believe in religion. I’ve had a lot of debates with a lot of people, and my God has never told me that someone needed to die if they didn’t agree with me. I’d like to think God is a bit more understanding and tolerant. Maybe I should write a book about that. Maybe in a couple thousand years it can be the new Bible.