The first step is always admitting the problem. Men are stupid, and I am a man. Therefore, I must be stupid. I’m ok with this revelation, because I realize that I am substantially less stupid than most guys.
I didn’t really understand this until I talked to several women who began describing themselves as crazy, “but not as crazy as most women” and for some reason – I understood that and accepted it as a positive. For some reason it doesn’t seem to have sunk in for women that all men are stupid – Which is weird, because women are generally NOT stupid.
Is that how far the bar has been lowered? He’s not THAT stupid. She’s not THAT crazy.
Here’s what I think the difference is for guys. All of us are stupid (did I cover that?) but you can still be stupid with a good heart.
The problem is finding dumb guys who are also assholes. On the other side the problem is finding crazy chicks who are also bitches. When you get that dreaded double-decker of shit – you’ve run into a bad person. There are a LOT of bad people out there. The trick is understanding that when dealing with men we are going to occasionally do and say stupid stuff that may hurt your feelings. It balances out if the same guy will drop what he’s doing to drive 2 hours to see you in an emergency, or tries to do everything he can to keep you happy.
It’s amazing how Karma works almost instantly when people do mean-spirited things. That’s why I try not to be an asshole as much as possible. You can be a crazy chick but when you start acting like a bitch don’t be surprised when things don’t go well for you. The universe has a way of working that stuff out, with or without my involvement.
Humans are flawed creatures. I’ve made my peace with who am I, and what I offer. For the precious handful of people who know me – You know I’d run through a wall to help the people I care about. The flipside is that sometimes I don’t know what you want me to do to make you happy. I’m a guy. Sometimes, you have to drop some hints. Hell, sometimes the hints aren’t good enough. Sometimes I don’t get it right – It doesn’t mean I won’t try my ass off to figure out a way to make you happy. One thing I’ve learned is how to make stuff work in my own way. Sometimes it’s the hard way – but somehow I always seem to land on my feet.
“I can’t wait to figure out what’s wrong with me / So I can this is the way that I used to be / There’s no substitute for time.” – Uncle John
All I can focus on when I wake up in the morning is being a better man today than I was yesterday. As long as I keep doing that, I’m going to be ok.