While not reported by the “lamestream media” at large, reports are that Obama opted to swear his second Oath of Office on a Koran instead of a Bible. When asked about the decision, President Obama said, “I can’t believe you Americans get so worked up over religion! Where I’m from, nobody really cares about this stuff at all, and people keep their spirituality between their God and themselves. Besides, I can’t run for a third term (but I’m working on it!) so I might as well just be myself now. Next I’m coming after all you redneck crackers and your guns!” Obama then reportedly threw down the mic, kissed a white woman on the mouth, and disappeared in a cloud of smoke.
In his private swearing in, Obama added further insult by adding the mustache of Joseph Stalin to the Koran. Chief Justice Roberts was visibly shaken during the ceremony but was calmed by the gift baskets passed out to friends and family that included free birth control pills for everyone – A nod to his controversial vote upholding Obamacare.
As originally reported by Chest Strongwell.
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–Sean Kemmerer is a freelance writer, administrator of Politics Without The Crazy Pills, can be followed @Walkofshameband, and thinks that with the DOW approaching its highest level in history that Obama is the worst Socialist ever.