Have you ever stepped back and actually thought for a moment about the Republican positions on reproductive rights and women’s health? In an effort to help them along with their “rebranding” and their need to reach out to the fairer sex, let’s take a look:

The Republican Party is staunchly anti-abortion. The official GOP platform is that Roe v. Wade should be overturned and that abortion should be completely illegal, even in the case of rape or incest, or to protect the life of the mother. That is not me saying it – That is the official platform of the Republican Party dating back to 2004. If you are a 14-year old girl who gets raped by your uncle and becomes pregnant as a result, well that’s just a “gift from God”:

Ok – So we’ve established that abortion is pretty much a no-no across the board. How can women reduce the number of unplanned pregnancies that would present them with making the unenviable choice of terminating the fetus? As luck would have it there have been amazing breakthroughs in medicine that give a woman (and as an offshoot of that, her family) more control over the timing and planning of having children. I believe (and I’m not a woman, so I could be wrong) that the technical term for this scientific breakthrough is “birth control” which in Layman’s terms, allows a woman to control when she is able to give birth to a child. Since Republicans are against abortion, they MUST be for this, since it will prevent women from needing abortions, right? Well not exactly. The “rebranded” GOP thinks that “eggs are people so they have pushed to ban certain types of hormonal birth control, and do not want health care providers to offer ANY coverage for contraception – Period. Nevermind that millions of women take birth control for reasons OTHER than family planning. For example, it reduces the risk of certain types of cancer, clears up acne, makes periods shorter and less painful, and countless other benefits to women who use it. I mean, it’s not like we are trying to get the government to pay for boner pills because after all – they already do.

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So far we are at no abortions, and no paying for birth control. Now we are to the poor, single mother who couldn’t afford birth control and who refused to get an abortion. She is now the mother of a newborn baby, but she is having a tough time caring for the child. Obviously since Republicans fought so hard for the child to be born they are committed to making sure that it is taken care of, right? Well not exactly. Republicans are fighting against Medicaid expansion that will provide low-cost health care to millions of Americans. In fact, Republicans would rather 30 million Americans go without health insurance so that the government has enough money to build a few more tanks. Seriously:

And I think it goes without saying that Republicans are not big fans of making sure that child has access to a healthy meal. How could they when millionaires are not getting the tax breaks that they so desperately need? Hey, we just prevented you from having access to contraception, then in a worst case scenario we also were against you having a legal, safe abortion. You can’t expect US to be responsible for YOUR baby! You should have just gone down to Planned Parenthood and gotten some free or low-cost birth control. Oh wait… we are against that, too.

Did I miss anything here?

WHERE is the “Liberal Media” getting this whole “War on Women” from, anyway?

Sean Kemmerer is a freelance writer, administrator of Politics Without The Crazy Pills, can be followed @Walkofshameband, and STILL has no clue how any creature with a uterus can vote Republican.